Friday, February 5, 2010
1,900,000,000
I’ve been praying a lot lately, and differently than in years past during the GDT Alliance Annual Meetings. Usually, I’m there, on the ground, working, working, working. It’s weird, but at the same time very cool, to be here, in the states, hearing SECOND HAND what’s going on. I’ve been able to pray differently because my prayers are not of the “Lord, please help me be your hands and feet and help to survive this. I need your strength...” They are instead, “God, bless these people and help them know you more. Help them know they are not invisible to you. Help them know they are LOVED by You, not because of what they do for Your glory, but just because they are YOURS. I have been asking for revelation for them of the love of Christ, the glory of God, and for an increase in anointing. It’s not that I didn’t pray those prayers before, but I didn’t do so as much, because in years past I was trying to survive the workload at the meetings. So this is fun in a bittersweet sort of way. I would love to sit down, look the leaders in the eye, pray for them, hear their stories, help them when they are sick, listen to their hearts. But I am here instead for this season, loving on my husband and son, and that’s wonderful, too! I still get to answer emails, work on new program proposals, send grants, hopefully be an encouragement and prayer support for those doing the HARD PART.
I love my job, I love what I get to do. I get to encourage, support, lift up those who are doing the HARD THINGS. I keep thinking how God is the lifter of their heads and He is allowing me to help Him do just that. They risk their lives, their comfort, their wealth, their health, all for the sake of the Gospel. They challenge me in really good ways. Many of them live with a BURNING in their heart for the name of the Lord to be taken to the places, the really dark ones where there is no or very little witness to the love of Jesus. I love that they are NOT ASHAMED at all to share their hearts with people. Not ashamed. I got an email yesterday from a dear brother in Christ, a discipleship program director. He and his wife have been trying to have a baby for three years. He was writing to THANK ME for praying for them, that she’s pregnant and they are expecting in 7 months or so. How am I THIS LUCKY? Really! Most of you who know us, know we named our son after a man who is a Kenyan reaching out in Kenya and beyond. He’s planted around 100 churches or so. Yeah, just 100. NO! 100!!! Praise GOD! I’m so glad we named our son after Benson. I’m glad because many times a day as I say my son’s name, I’m reminded of this very real reality... so many are dying without knowing Him. What am I doing about that?
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about calling, about vision, about things that are not temporal, but very much eternal. This is what it’s about. It’s about remaining true to the call. You see, I have a deep conviction that EVERY person should have at least one chance to choose Jesus. I don’t know exact statistics, but I’m pretty sure there are hundreds, thousands dying EACH DAY without Jesus. That is heart-breaking to me. For more info on what we do, head over to this site: www.globaldisciples.net and if you want to be inspired visually, head over here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M4chd4lZXHQ
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Nate and I have been reading a book called Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas on a recommendation from our friends Ryan and Jen. It's been a good book and we've been s.l.o.w.l.y. reading it. It's good to digest. It's not only been good and challenging for me in marriage, but also in everyday life, in ministry, and for my walk with Jesus. Right now we're reading about serving. I'm blessed with a husband who serves Benson and I very selflessly and it makes it a joy to serve him right back. But the other night we read about serving those who are not "worthy"... "The important thing to remember is that service is a spiritual discipline we owe to God, and it can only be lived out as it is applied to others. I learned long ago that God has called me to serve Him through people, regardless of whether those people are "worthy" of being served....I reach out to people because God has loved me and asked me to love others in return, not because the people I am loving are "worthy" of love or because they'll thank me for it in the end. It's not for me to mak judgments about their "worthiness". I don't know how I could do that anyway. It's for me to love God by loving others....God is always worthy of being obyed and served, so when I act out of obedience to Him, the person who receives my service doesn't have to be deserving - they're benefiting from what I owe God."
And if that wasn't enough, he goes on to talk about this...
"Jesus' example has challenged me greatly in this regard. None of the disciples deserved to have their feet washed at the Last Supper - all of them would abandon him within a few hours - yet Jesus went ahead and did it anyway (See John 13:1-17). In fact, Jesus even washed the feet of Judas, who was just hours away from betraying Him. God doesn't tell us to love only those who deserve it or to serve only those who serve us back. If you are in a one-sided marriage where you feel like you're giving and giving and never receiving, my heart goes out to you. You can partially redeem such a situation by becoming more God-oriented. Remind yourself that you are also in a situation where you can grow spiritually by leaps and bounds. If the heart of Christianity is service, any situation that shapes the spirit of a servant in you is worthwhile - even a lopsided marriage. But we need more than mere grudging acceptance of a difficult truth. Part of Christian service is performing it with a beautiful spirit."
I'm going to continue quoting... Keep reading, it gets better. Makes me want to leap to my feet and shout AMEN!
"One of the challenges of Christian virtue is living out the teaching of the Scriptures that stress the inner reality behind the external action. Jesus said we might do the right thing (give money, for instance) for the wrong reason (to show off), in which case we lose our reward (see Matthew 6:1-4). Without a doubt our service can be subject to wrong motivations...."
Lord, make me sweet! I admit, over the past number of months, I haven't been praying this little nugget as much as before because I was in SURVIVAL mode. New mom, wife, daughter of Christ, daughter, sister, friend, missionary, etc., etc. but God has made it clear to me that I need to start back up again. For a number of years I have prayed for God to make me sweet. That sounds like a cheesy prayer, I realize. But let me explain why I pray that. I want to be a sweet aroma to Him. I want to be a sweet servant. I want His name to be sweet to those who don't know Him...
Have you ever noticed when Satan convicts you, it's heavy and nasty and brutal? But when Jesus does, it's sweet and inspiring and encouraging? He's been doing that for me lately, reminding me of my need for Him to do anything remotely sweet. And I'm grateful for that conviction. I'm grateful that He loves me enough to not leave me the same tomorrow as I am today.
Philippians 2
Imitating Christ's Humility 1If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. 3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
5Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6Who, being in very nature[a] God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, 7but made himself nothing, taking the very nature[b] of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross! 9Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Okay, I'm done with this most random post... but it's what's on my heart these days. God, the lost, my family, and a few other things thrown in. :)
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NATE!!!
- God has blessed me with a husband who is both strong and kind.
- He is both wise and willing to admit he has a lot to learn.
- He is capable of doing so many things and remains humble in them.
- He loves Jesus and loves to spend time with Him, making Him a priority in his life.
- He leads and serves us in ways that I'm pretty sure honor God. A lot.
- He is selfless - often giving up what he would prefer to do or have for the health (and sanity sometimes) of the family.
- He desires to be better. Not just so he can be better, but so that he can really honor God with his life.
- He is committed to our marriage and to our family - and especially to the vows he made with me and with God on our wedding day.
- He is such an awesome father: changing dirty diapers (which is no small feat, since we do cloth ;)), reading to, playing with, talking to, and just plain old loving on Benson. I love to watch them together.
- He takes the trash out faithfully. This seems silly, but I really hate that job :)
- He helps me clean.
- He accepts me as I am (which in case you were unaware, some days, this must be very difficult ;))
- But in that acceptance, he wants to see me be the BEST I can be. He's helping me get there.
- He stuffs the liners into the diapers (maybe my second least favorite job).
- He takes good care of his health
- He carries the car seat to the car when we're together and still tries to open doors for me (even though that's harder now that we have baby and gear to lug around).
- He doesn't just expect me to be the nurterer to our son, he believes he should be as well. And for the record, you can totally tell Benson adores him!
- He loves his family.
- He loves our friends.
- He is growing in grace, in the Lord, and changing - in really good ways!
- He is super good with finances and that makes me feel super good (because I'm not!)
- He has eternity in his heart more than the temporal things of this earth.
- He laughs at me. I mean with me.
- He likes my family and friends (and if you thought I was weird... just kidding)
- He is very, very, very responsible
- I like the way he looks - a lot :)
BONUS: he is one of the more compassionate people I know... I really like that.
Hmm... I could go on and on. But he's not fifty, so I'll stop. :)
So, babe - HAPPY BIRTHDAY - you are LOVED!!!!
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
From Christmas to New Year to Now
Have you ever felt like this after the holidays? ;)
I don't want to forget all that God has done in the past weeks... It's been an awesome couple of weeks.... I've enjoyed being with Nate who had a LOT of time off work and it was so wonderful to be able to be a family and get to know each other even better. I can say I've been blessed with two incredible men in my life!
The past couple of months, I've been meeting with my friend on Tuesday afternoons to pray for our families and some other families. I've also had the opportunity to hang out with some other ladies and God is doing BIG things. I definitely sense in the times of uncertainty, He is proving Himself faithful as always and answering prayers left and right. I look forward to seeing His hand in more and more things in days to come! I just feel like I need to boast in the Lord. The very relevant, HUGE answers to prayer are astounding. So I will boast in Him. And thank Him for letting me join Him for the ride!
Our sweet friend Jen came over yesterday (we missed her hubby Ryan and Nate, but it was fun to have girl time finally!) and we had an awesome visit! She spoiled me with lunch from Panera and brought the cutest little outfit for Benson. It fit him perfectly and don't the two of them look super cute together? Yeah, I thought so. Jen is a miracle and so is Benson. It was awesome to hear the dreams of God for her life and I just say that the promises of God are YES and AMEN! I'm believing with you and Ryan! Please ignore the folded laundry on the bed ;)Nate and I are looking forward to traveling to California next week so my best friend and her hubby can finally meet Benson (and I can finally meet her brother Jeff's fiance - both Christine and Jeff have been dear friends of mine since I was 14. Or was it 15? I'm pretty sure it's 14. Whatever the age, they've been my thick and thin friends - the ones you love to pieces even if you don't get to see them often enough). From California, we will drive for about eight hours to have Christmas with my mom and sister in Sedona, Arizona. It hasn't felt like Christmas is really over because of this, so I'm stuck in limbo here. ha! Can I just say I'M EXCITED!!!!!!!!! It's going to be such an awesome trip!!!! I can't wait to see all the people I love so much! And the best part, is that the trip will end up costing very little with flyer miles, discounts on car, staying with family and friends, and travel vouchers. I see it as a blessing from God for us to be able to do this. He's so good!
And we sign out tonight with a video of Benson being cute and me being a dork trying to get him to be cute. Ah, such is parenting, eh? Turn up the sound so you get the best of both...
We love you!
Friday, December 25, 2009
It's Christmas!
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Oh, Tannenbaum
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Thankful and Blessed
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Three Months Old!!!
Today, for Benson's three month birthday, he decided to finally, after many days of rolling from his back to his side, make it all the way over to his belly!!!! *yeah, Sarah, about 40 minutes after we left your house!* I thought it was so fun, but he, on the other hand realized that motion created a dilemma for him. Now he was stuck in his least favorite position - the belly. And he was laying on one of his hands. Ha. I had to rescue him after many minutes of intense frustration.
My (Jenny) mom comes tomorrow for an eight day visit and I think Benson will delight her. She hasn't seen him since he was one week old, so this will be a special treat for all of us. AND! Nate comes home tomorrow, too. It's going to be a great Friday for me and for Benson!!!
Happy Thanksgiving Season everyone! We all have SO MUCH to be thankful for!!!!!!!
